Twitter Bible

You may have heard of Twitter. You may have heard of the Bible. There are a few people who have put it together. To get you started in the very old and the very new:

Twitter: a website which allows people to communicate thoughts. These thoughts are often trivial and/or egotistical in nature. These thoughts are also limited to 140 characters (due to the constraints of text messages), meaning that abbreviations such as BRB (be right back) and LOL (laugh out loud) are commonly required.

Bible: big book, written over the course of several hundred years from the dawn of time, detailing the universe’s history.

Put the two together and you end up with quite a fun summary of Genesis:

Day 1: Lighting system installed. BRB. Days 2-6: Some assembly required: sky, plants, cows, people. Left humans in charge, LOL. Day 7: Siesta.

I did want to check some of this out before blogging about it, but Twitter seems to be permanently over capacity. There’s loads of people doing “cool” and “useful” stuff with Twitter (including IBM), but I can never be on the site long enough to find anything useful.

Update: finally got onto Twitter long enough to find the main Twitter page: What Would God Tweet.

The Information Age

Ever wondered why it’s called the information age?

Well it’s because we’re now generating such vast quantities of electronic data every day. Eric Schmidt is the CEO of Google – a company that knows a thing or two about data. Speaking earlier this month, he stated:

There was 5 exabytes of information created between the dawn of civilization through 2003, … but that much information is now created every 2 days, and the pace is increasing…

For non-techies, 5 exabytes (5EB) probably means as much as “one-point-twenty-one-gigawatts” did in Back To The Future, but take it from me that’s a lot. In PC World terms, 5 exabytes is 5,000,000,000 gigabytes. Average computers have hard disks around 500 gigabytes in size. And now we’re generating that every day.

That’s why it’s called the information age.

iPod? iCan’t

Nope – just tried again and I can’t justify buying an iPod. Let it be known, iPod Touch, that I was seriously looking in your direction, but still couldn’t convince myself that you were worth a quarter of a really good lens for my camera.

For all they’re shiny, trendy and (according to the media) essential to ensure you have any friends at all, I just can’t see any point in me buying one. To me, the whole iPod ethos appears to be based around how much freedom the device gives you when you’re “on the move”. It therefore seems that my inability to purchase is essentially based on the following fact: if I am moving from one location to another, then 99.9% of the time, I’m driving. No public transport, no walking: just as sole captain of HMS Ian’s Honda.

My car is not iPod compatible, but has a sublime 8-speaker sound system with 6 CD auto-changer. All can be controlled without my fingertips leaving the steering wheel. So I don’t see any point in using one in the car.

When not driving, I live the majority of my life at home or work. At work, the scope for personal entertainment is minimal. I occasionally listen to music from my laptop, but that’s not too often. Anyway, I’m not buying an iPod just so I can listen to the occasional tune while working.

At home I have no requirement for hand-held entertainment. Music? Just pop the stereo on, which can stream any one of the tracks in the 16GB music collection instantly. Or go upstairs and work on the computer and do the same.

More expensive iPods allow you to watch movies. Whooop-a-dee-doo! Let’s peer at a tiny, highly-reflective screen for two hours while getting wrist cramp holding it upright for that long. If you remembered to make sure the battery was fully-charged. No thanks. Should the time arise when I can watch a full-length movie at home (and I believe the last time that happened was 2007), then I’ll do it lying on the sofa with a decent screen, sound, wine, and crisps.

Games? No thanks. I’ve got a GameCube sitting downstairs ready to go and I rarely get on that.

“Surfing the Internet”? Hmmm… With such a silly little screen, I’m thinking it’s going to be less like surfing and more like paddling while lying on a lolly stick. But! they all cry. You can zoom the screen just by swatting your fingers like this! And? Why should you have to? Besides, unless you go for the iPhone (or the monumentally expensive iPad), you can’t surf while out and about anyway.

And that’s another thing. What exactly do people use the Internet for when they’re out and about? Note that neither looking at a picture of your m8 and commenting “OMG!!!! LOL!!!!” on some social networking site, nor cheating with Wikipedia in a pub quiz, counts as real usage. The only real demo of mobile internet I’ve seen and thought “that’s clever” is of maps to get you from here to a given location. And possibly buying tickets online just before you arrive somewhere. Based on recent mobile Internet usage figures, there must be a hell of a lot of lost, ill-prepared people out there.

An iPod would replace my 2003-vintage HP iPaq 5550, which is now starting to show its age in terms of connectivity and compatibility. But at least it had a to-do list application available out of the box.

1 2 3 55